A warm welcome to you all on a not so warm day
Arrrrrrgh.....a lovely long post to share with you all, pressed button for publish and poof vanished....how frustrating!!!!
And so to I begin again to create something similar... or not.
Not so good a day for inspiration, the cloud can dampen our resolve; yet we can enter the world of ourselves and others to brighten our outlook despite the greyness that besets us.......
I look through the glass onto the grey day
Wondering what will be...
Shall I open the envelope and unfolding the paper contents...?
Or leave it be for another day?
Or leave it be for another day?
It's a choice that is mine...
To crack open the nut of my pride
Discarding the hard shell that
Protects my vulnerability
A chance of rebuff
Maybe not....is it worth the chance?
So I'll tap out the text with feeling
Firing it off to the recipient I care for
Hoping it is understood in the way it is meant
It is worth it for me and I will
Swallow and gulp down my pride
Steadying myself in the process
To meet with whatever greets my eyes
Perhaps with warmth, yet possible
Lip service that'll do the trick
Keeping a safe distance
Holding onto the thimble of pride
That protects from feeling and dealing
Preventing the needle prick from drawing blood
Even if it is blood of friendship
Fresh and bonding
So here I go and tap with meaning
Click the anticipation button
And wait to see if it hits the spot
And runs deep or paddles in the shallow end
Flicking the surface without
Making waves too engulfing to channel
Lest the experience is overwhelming
Yet to deny will never allow us to travel
And know a new track
That at first may appear bumpy and unkempt
But could lead us to the smooth tarmac
Of the newly laid bypass
I am an able swimmer of emotion at times
When I'm less strong and in need
Of my confort blanket
I greet myself and introduce 'me' to
The world of communication
Writing to myself or whoever will listen
Letting the droplets turn to rain
Sometimes allowing the gushing white water
To rapidly undo me of my own fish tank
When swimming the neverending cirlce
Of the same bowl brings about
Mental confusion
Did I hear the ping of a hoped for text
Winking its light for my notice .....
Tara for now.....
Discarding the hard shell that
Protects my vulnerability
A chance of rebuff
Maybe not....is it worth the chance?
So I'll tap out the text with feeling
Firing it off to the recipient I care for
Hoping it is understood in the way it is meant
It is worth it for me and I will
Swallow and gulp down my pride
Steadying myself in the process
To meet with whatever greets my eyes
Perhaps with warmth, yet possible
Lip service that'll do the trick
Keeping a safe distance
Holding onto the thimble of pride
That protects from feeling and dealing
Preventing the needle prick from drawing blood
Even if it is blood of friendship
Fresh and bonding
So here I go and tap with meaning
Click the anticipation button
And wait to see if it hits the spot
And runs deep or paddles in the shallow end
Flicking the surface without
Making waves too engulfing to channel
Lest the experience is overwhelming
Yet to deny will never allow us to travel
And know a new track
That at first may appear bumpy and unkempt
But could lead us to the smooth tarmac
Of the newly laid bypass
I am an able swimmer of emotion at times
When I'm less strong and in need
Of my confort blanket
I greet myself and introduce 'me' to
The world of communication
Writing to myself or whoever will listen
Letting the droplets turn to rain
Sometimes allowing the gushing white water
To rapidly undo me of my own fish tank
When swimming the neverending cirlce
Of the same bowl brings about
Mental confusion
Did I hear the ping of a hoped for text
Winking its light for my notice .....
I hold dear the cathartic process of creating headspace when chucking out the contents of the bin of trash and filling the new enpty space with colourful dialogue. It simplifies and creates order that my receptors can cope with.
Using this mission of self care I realise I'm feeling better second upon second, minute by minute, more robust to meet the what ifs or buts of my world, pumping the muscles of resilience and giving me strength of mind and physical stability.
My outlook is sunnier than this grey May day and I've beat the doldrums that could have vyed for space and won.
Tara for now.....
LAURA
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